Tuesday, April 17, 2007

phrase it

The alarm goes off in your deep deeeep sleep, you were with beyounce knowles probably in Jayz's yatch and she liked you so much she almost became too charitable to you( i mean charity charity with S). You get up pissed to turn it off but realise it was the phone ringing, you glance at the watch and its 5:00am. Now who could be calling me at this time. ohh!!! its her. Perfect timing when your just in the moment, it brings a smile to your face.

H: "Hi babes"
She doesn't say anything
is she ok.

You hear a sob, then another and it gets worse.

H:"baby whats wrong? whats ..........."
You go on and on asking what it could be but your figuring it all out in your brain.....why would someone call at this hour ....oh my....... SHEZ PREGNANT!!!!#@^% UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

The world has been crashing at her feet from the time she got the news! How could he do this? how could he do this to me. She busts up in tears, she doesnt want to but she cant just stop crying. She has never felt like this before. How could he?

She tries to swallow it inside but its too much to contain it just regugitates back. She takes a deep ब्रेअथ........that doesnt help........, she takes a deeeeeeeppppp breath,........ and another. Then trys to regain her composure by siting down. She takes a deeeeep one again to keep her cool. God why is this happening to me. I thought we were meant to be. Of all tramps he goes for that one?
She gets her phone and scrolls through the phonebook looking for any of her girls for help: trisha..no she will not help..prisca...no, crystal...uhmmmmm...no.
And finally lands on the devil himself. Its way past midnight but she doesnt care.
Crmmmm crmmm....the tears come back and she cant help it but cry.

H:"whats the problem babes?"
...you've already figured it all out...so you try to calm her like any gentleman would at this time....you cant freak out...not now. So your thinking...what are we going to do...can she have the baby or..? you cant bring up the or ......you dont want to but....no...you were carefull..yaa..you were carefull...its probabaly another false alarm just like last time.
You take a deep breath of victory/triumph...she cant be, she was in her safe days and....बुत....
why cant she say something...its just a false alarm.....

P:"Hannington, i want to talk to you@#".
That"s not good, she called you hannington, she never calls you hannington. So shez pissed, its not entirely my फूलत......Why do i always have to take the blame.

H:"Yah: we can talk tommorow morning at 7:00. I'll cut the morning lecture" P:he was going to cut it अन्य्वाय...., he always cuts stat, he thinks i dont know his timetable.

P:"Tomorrow it is"

She switches off without anything like; ugh, the uusual.
Whats her problem, its just another false alarm. You switch on the tv and catch the latest on the cricket world cup. Its not entirely my fault ..you keep on reminding yourself.
You think about the future but it keeps on fading away, your really not sure if you are getting married immediately, or if you want a job, no..or you'll get one. Sleep steals you away.

BANG!! BANG!! That can wake you out of hell. EH! banange.
you get up and open the door and shez still crying..

P:"How could you do this to me? How could you hannington?" You try to calm her by touching her or a hug or something but she just shrugs you off. Ohhh thats not good, thats not good at all.

H:"Whats the problem?" P: He even has the....... ugh, to ask me that? Does he think am a fool @ #

P:"I thought we were happy Hanny, I thought we were a good couple, I've given you all my all inspite of the few things you have done for me."

H:"The few things i have done for you!!" H:i have given her everything, I spent the whole of last sems allowance on her. What does this have to do with her pregnancy. It's getting to her in her first stage, how will she be in 3 months?

P"... and you go around sleeping with that tramp!!,, hanny i thought you were different ..."

Hmmmm!! You take a breath of defeat, so she found out. You touch touch around for a chair for support. Your wordless, speechless, verbaless, nothing comes out as you keep on recalling that night. How you tried to stay way from that Ivy, her bitchy friend but she got you. No no no no no you weren't drunk, you were normal but pretended to be drunk and you got her though she got you too. You keep quiet and she goes on and on but you can't hear her. Now would be the best time to say something, come on think of something, something that has never been said/phrased or composed or written, something einstein and shakespear have never mentioned or thought of.

P:"Am done, i have done everything for you, everything. But i guess they weren't enough. I wasn't good enough( she says all this in tears). You can go and have fun with your bitch."
She heads for the door, now would be the best time to say it, the phrase.

H:"Babes (she turns and looks at you, guess she still likes calling her that)........you pause and then you...

"Am sorry".
She gives you that look of I dont want to ever see you again and turns back heading for the door. Bangs the door hard.
You've probably never been real sorry in you life but this time you were....you meant that word.
But it just wasnt the perfect phrase or word for that moment, and you guess they'll never be.